A Most Unfortunate Name...

Yes. The middle name above is, in fact, Vince Penesis DDS... That's Vince Penesis, ladies and gentlemen. First name: Vince. Last name: Penesis. That means that if he goes to an endodontist conference and wears one of those "Hello. My Name is..." badges, his would say "Hello. My Name is Vince Penesis" That means that when someone hard of hearing inevitably asks him how to pronounce his name he has to loudly say "MY NAME IS VINCE PENESIS". Our prayers are with you and, Vince Penesis, we hope you have sired no children - because we'd have to report you for child abuse. School children can be cruel and are notoriously bad spellers

... All the best, Mr. Penesis.


  1. Well, it's possible he pronounces his name "PEN-e-sis," which would be a little bit easier.

    A good friend of mine from college had "WEINER" for a last name. You wouldn't dream of making fun of him for it, though.

  2. In my universe, he'd pronounce his name quite differently from what you suggest... and he'd name his kid Richard... and he'd play a lot of league sports where he'd have his name emblazoned on the back of his jerseys... and the Penesis would have family reunions yearly, where they'd have three legged races and, again, matching shirts, perhaps with an interesting crest or coat of arms and, of course, the proud name in massive font..and a quick family motto like... "The Penesis family - Work hard, play hard"... and then for some reason he'd be tried for some crime and the judge would say things like "Penesis. please rise"... It would all end tragically though...Seems inevitable...

    As for Weiner:
    Seems like there are only two ways a guy with the name Weiner might end up:
    1. As a way to overcompensate, he gets intimidating tattoos and bulks up so that any smirk during an introduction gets wiped out in an instant for fear of reprisal.
    2. He is crushed by incessant teasing and develops agoraphobia...only to receive daily prank calls by local teenagers.

    Someone should start a support group for these people.


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