12/4/08

Cantankerous Abuelito Porfirio Analyzes the Economic Meltdown

(Above) The one time my abuelito Porfirio smiled. He had just strangled a man...just to watch him die. He made me take the picture...for posterity...I still have nightmares...seriously...and I developed a noticeable twitch...and he made me hang that silly hat in my room...The guy he killed was in a jalapeno costume outside of a Chili's...Abuelito thought it was a rather racist caricature.

-ENLA, cocina

In my endless hours of service to this site, I seek to find fresh perspectives and analysis of current events. I look for items, insights, and vantage points that might be of particular interest to the Latino community and which might be overlooked or dismissed by the mainstream media. Which brings me to today's guest analyst, my Abuelito Porfirio. He will be voicing the opinion of all old, angry Mexican men (Fear not, he has their permission). He will be providing his take on the current state of the nation - including the economy, the president elect, the likelihood that Texas may soon be a blue state, and other current events etc. etc. etc.

I have asked him for his opinion and am waiting for him to stop peeling an orange into ribbons. He seems to be deep in thought.

Oh, here it comes, the much anticipated reply...

"Pinche bola de maricones. Todos."

"Anything else abuelito?"

"No seas puto."

"Okay... I think that's all, for now. Next week he will take a critical look at Obama's cabinet and the current state of the Latino entrepreneur.

4 comments:

  1. It's like an optical illusion...in the right attire anyone can look Latino. Jackie Chan, Nelson Mandela...seriously, picture it.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Try Gary Coleman.

    ReplyDelete
  3. vicente fox is hot...

    ReplyDelete

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